I have been interested in the Amanda Knox case for years. The media made her into a poster-child for psychopathy even before she was found guilty of the murder of Meredith Kercher.
But somehow they were never able to convince me 100 percent.
I was always going back and forth: she could be a psychopath, but she could also be a tragic victim of her own naivete.
Which one is it?
The fact that she was convicted of the murder and the fact that she was later released did not sway me in one direction or the other. I don’t trust the justice system of any country. I am aware that they are all capable of profound mistakes. Every day an innocent person’s life is ruined and another monster is set free. (I believe that Casey Anthony, for example, is a child-murdering psychopath who was found innocent.)
I am also very, very aware that the media portrayals are usually wrong. I like to use my head and take every public image with a grain of salt. The media is full of psychopaths who like to dehumanize their subjects (or objects) for the sake of the dramatic effect.
Amanda Knox as a psychopath – now that is good drama, a very good story . I was drawn to it like everybody else.
I forgot about it for a while. And then-boom-she was convicted again. This time I am even more intrigued.
Is this girl really that evil that she kills without a motive? We know psychopaths are capable of doing that. Killing for fun or just out of boredom.
Is she really such a good actress that she fools me every time I watch her interview to think that she is being honest? I don’t know. I still don’t know. And I would love to hear your opinion.
Here is what people who know Amanda say about her. But sometimes psychopaths can fool everybody, even close friends and family.
Here is the other side- describing her as a psychopath.
It is possible that she is one. She lied. She accused an innocent person to save herself. She behaved incomprehensibly odd after her roommate was murdered. Some say that she behaved odd in interviews available on YouTube.
But here, I want to talk about why I think it is possible that she might not be a psychopath. I will speak from my experience because that is what I know best, since I am not an expert criminal profiler.
I will tell you a few things that I do know:
I know how young, naive girls think because I used to be one
I’ve known quite a few American college girls
I know shock because I also lost a close friend suddenly
I know what it is like to be innocently accused
As I mentioned in one of my earlier posts, I used to be a very idealistic girl who saw the best in everybody. And I believed that everybody should like me because I never meant no harm to anybody. I thought all people should just get along.
But, not everyone liked me. Actually, quite a few people hated me.
Very early on, around puberty, I was labeled a slut and a whore for no reason. Packs of bullies were chasing me like dogs on a daily basis. It got to the point where my (very few) friends had to look around the corner to see if a street was clear so that I could get to school and back safely. I didn’t understand it. I didn’t know how to fight to prove my innocence against such overwhelming quantity of wrong accusations and misunderstanding. I was a slut because I was being sexually bullied. That made no sense to me. But instead of apologizing to everybody, I kept my head high. I was just trying to keep myself together, but it got misinterpreted completely wrong- that I had no shame.
Years later, when all that was behind me, I moved to America as a high school exchange student. I was shocked to see that the kids my age were a lot less street-smart than I was. It was as if they lived in Disneyland, where everything was custom-made for them and where they had very little contact with the real world. I felt sorry for them and, at the same time, I envied them. I felt a lot more mature than the rest, but I did adapt easily and did everything they did- and enjoyed it.
But seeing how crazy everyone went once they got to college- that was just ridiculous. These kids were way too immature to be on their own. The guys were drinking enough to kill themselves and doing really dangerous, stupid and non-funny things, and the girls slept with everyone. (I have to mention that sex was something I was not interested in for a very long time, probably because of the trauma I went through.) Everyone was so obnoxious, and I really did not fit in. I felt very old among them.
This is maybe what the Italians did not get. A twenty-year-old American is the same as, maybe, a 15-year-old Italian. I don’t mean to be mean, I love my American friends, but that is a big cultural difference. Just at that age. Later, when they learn how to handle being grown up, it evens out.
Now my third point: I lost a friend in a car accident. She was one of my closest friends and I was supposed to see her on the day she died. I was completely shocked by what happened but I didn’t cry for a couple of days. I was just quiet and my face was straight while everyone else was crying. I just could not believe it. It did not seem real to me. What was I supposed to do, force myself to cry? At the funeral it hit me how real it was and that was when I broke down. But for a year I struggled to understand it, every day, and how that could also have been me. I am sure that some of the people who immediately cried for her do not even think about her every day anymore. But I do. So, the reactions to a tragedy are not the same for everyone. I got really mad at her husband too. The way he dealt with it was to go out and pick up girls. I know that he is not a psychopath but he is just very insecure and hates being alone. I still it’s wrong and I don’t talk to him. But that’s a whole different story.
And I want to talk about how I got caught in a store “stealing”. I wasn’t trying to steal anything. I had not taken a basket and I had too much stuff so I put something under my armpit to read a label of something else. The security guards came and took me to the back room. I laughed. I sat there smirking in disbelief because I thought it was so absurd. They didn’t think it was cute.
Of course, when you are a naive girl, you think people are going to see right away that you are harmless. Hey, it’s just me people! Not some crazy criminal! But these people don’t know you. They are serious.
They let me go but did not believe my story for a second. I was told not to come back to the store ever again.
Of course, nobody was brutally murdered then. And Amanda had no excuse for her own smirks in the courtroom.
She was not a stupid girl, she was highly intelligent and she should have realized how serious the situation was.
I don’t know what to think. I’m going in circles.
What I’m confused the most about is: Why would Rafaele Sollecito, who had known Amanda only for 7 days, protect her unless he knew she was completely innocent? And unless he was a man who stood up for the truth and justice?
Anyone who is capable of murder would throw her under the bus to save himself.
So her ex-boyfriend Rafaele is now going to jail for 25 years.
And the real psychopath, Meridith’s killer, is probably watching all that and laughing from a safe place somewhere?
What do you think? Please share your thoughts in the forum!